All good (Day 2)
The next day Bara and Lucas were going to the capital – Las Palmas, by car. I said I would take a lift with them. I called the airport because I wanted to know if the backpack is there. but nobody was picking it up. Bloody bank holidays. Nobody works. Hopefully, I will be able to sort it out today. I messed up the time, Bara and Lucas wanted to go when I was out with Daisy. They had to wait for me and we were late for the meeting they had with their previous landlord. They were going to return the keys to their old flat. I felt like an idiot. The backpack, the trouble with the dog, now they are late because of me,… Oh well, I wish my life confusion and chaos that rules my world would not affect other people, but it does.
They were a little bit annoyed, but they forgave me, and talked with me, and smiled. Later, after their meeting, we went for coffee. Lucas had some other things to do and he went back home by bus, so I stayed with Bara alone. We walked along the waterfront of Las Palmas. Just two old friends chatting and laughing, and discussing the differences of life here on Gran Canaria island and back home in the Czech republic. Also, we talked about the change Bara went through with her rooting and creating family ideas as they plan to have a baby. I managed to call the airport and the backpack was there. Hoorrraayy!! Thank you, Orion, for looking after me and Daisy, I officially name you my personal guard.
After we picked up the backpack, we drove cheerfully back home, with the backpack loaded and we plugged the phone into the car radio. Bara wanted to listen to my music because she always liked my playlists. We were singing along and I felt relaxed. The palm alley along the road made my eyes happy. At home, I rushed to have an online lesson, and I passed Michal in the corridor. He just said between the doors, that he is leaving. He decided to be alone for a couple of days to finish his writing, and he wants to have space for himself to focus on his work properly.
Oh well, that’s the last grain of my group trip assumptions being blown away. Whatever. Improvisation and ability to adapt to the changes are my strengths, that’s what others say, right?!
After the lesson we cooked together with Bara which was nice and the meal cooked from the fresh vegetables from the market that Lucas brought tasted amazing. Also, he brought me a pack of gingerbread biscuits because he knows I like them.
All bad (Day 3)
In the morning I heard some discussion of Bara and Lucas. It was in Spanish but I could understand some parts of it. I asked Bara if everything is ok, and she said yes. Lucas left. Bara said there will be friends coming around for lunch today. Then she said she needs to talk with me. She started to ask me first about the workaway options. I said that I am in touch with two hosts, but it doesn’t look like an immediate solution. She said that they are a little bit disappointed with my way of managing things, that the deal was I will stay a few nights, and now it already feels like I am for a while there without even being close to having anything else sorted. That Lucas needs his space and recently they had the house full of people all the time and it’s too much now. Also, they don’t like the dog inside the house.
I felt terrible, let’s be honest. I said I can feel that we are not welcome here and that I am trying to find other options to move away as soon as possible. She said it’s not like I am not welcome, but I felt like it anyway.
I sat by the computer and spent 2 hours answering nearly every workaway option which was on the website.
Then I went for a walk with the dog. Everything was falling at me. Sadness was wrapping me slowly, and I could feel it crushing me from the inside. It’s quite terrible to feel somehow wrong in your good friend’s house, somehow inappropriate. I felt like I should not be there, it was such an unpleasant feeling that I just wanted to evaporate in the air. I know they like me in a way, but I also knew Lucas is too polite to be honest with me and to tell me he doesn’t want me to stay longer. I found a little path and a bit of green area, hidden aside from all the narrow streets with the houses. Come on Moni, it’s not a big deal. You will find a solution soon. The saddest part about it was that I really felt like my friend is dumping me a little. Ok, I let the stress go out. I let the pressure go with few tears. I let it get out so then I can move to another step. I walked down the street with my headphones and I sunk my mind in the music. I managed to put the sad thoughts aside. Beginnings are often hard. Focus. Do what you can. I tried to reset my mood. I tried to get from the thin line of falling into sadness to the very opposite side, to my Leonidas „go and kill it“ mode.
It’s funny, but sometimes I play these games with myself:
„You’re a little rabbit, but you’re also a wolf, do you remember? You don’t need help, you can handle this shit. Find your new kingdom. Find it, rule, and shine again. The song helped. Just the right song for such a moment. A bit of African animal kingdom atmosphere somehow imprinted a feeling of the strong animal within me again. „Hear me – The very best.“
I came back to the house with a smile and grounded. Lucas was cooking and I went back to work on my future steps. Later the friends of Lucas have arrived. The girl didn’t speak that well English, so I ended up talking to the guy mainly. he was very nice, and he was reminding me of somebody a lot, but I just couldn’t figure out, who. We talked about walking routes here on Gran Canaria and also about his relationship. He lives here, and his girlfriend works and lives in Spain, and he claims he likes it like this. That was an interesting concept to talk about. According to his words, this helps a lot to sustain the relationship fresh and precious for both of them. Every time they go to see each other, they are really looking forward to it and they always make it special. „Both of us also like our own space, and time to work on our own projects, you know“ he added with a smile. Then she walked out of the kitchen, laughing. He stopped paying attention to me. He looked at her like she’s the only person in that room. Their eyes met with a little hidden secret message which was passed in that sight, and which only them two could read. The music was playing. He stood up and walked towards her. He put his arms around her and they started to dance to this random song. It was beautiful to watch them dancing and looking each other in the eyes. A strong feeling ran over my spine in one second. I believe we are meant to meet, see, experience certain moments which leave a footprint. The point is not to copy it. But to get inspired. Take the important information out of it. I do not know what exactly is the information I am taking in now, and what am I meant to do with it, I just feel like something important manifests in front of me at some moments of my life. In such moments I just try to be fully present. To save the data, for later unconscious use. I try to just be there, see, feel, notice little details, remember what was said.
The food was ready. Lucas cooked amazing Lasagne, and we enjoyed more interesting conversations sitting at the dinner table.
Later in the afternoon, I went for another walk with Daisy. I was determined to find a way up the little hill that you could see from all the little streets. There was a cross on the top. I walked checking the online map but I didn’t manage to find a path up there. I even spoke with a handsome local guy. His English was excellent, he could pronounce the word „way“ really well. But he seemed not to understand what it means unfortunately. So it was my turn to show my Spanish skills. „Esta el camino aquí, to the top?“ I asked mixing English with bad Spanish and pointing to the top of the hill hopelessly. „Aaaah, síí?! No.“ And then he started to talk Spanish really fast and I was done. But I got the point that it probably isn’t possible to get to the top, because I noticed the word „privado“ which, surprisingly, means private. Lucky bastard, who owns a little viewpoint hill as his private property. I found another little trail on the map starting very near to my current location, so I decided to take that one instead.
What a good decision!
The path was going down the hill and straight away a nice view to a valley opened in front of me. It was a bit cloudy but it was warm. Daisy was happily wagging her tail, jumping down the winding path. Te path was passing a ruin of a house. Wooow, something mysterious waiting for me to explore. I am like a little curious kid with these things. I crossed the fallen timber and entered the broken ground floor. Plants and even little trees growing from the ground were charming. A hole with broken edges, a magic view from what used to be a window. I walked through to another room. Plants growing from the rest of the first floor above my head were rustling in the light wind. On the other side of the house was a pile of rubble, high enough to climb to the floor above. But I didn’t risk it. I just took pictures and inhaled the atmosphere of the forgotten place, that nature was taking back. I found Daisy standing in front of the house on the little ridge of rocks, looking down the valley. She looked amazing, enjoying the view. I sat next to her for a bit and just watched the land with her.
Then we walked further. And just around the corner, I found an amazing majestic tree. It was super beautiful, and I saw this kind of a tree first time in my life. Only a hidden tiny path led to it, and next to it was a little cave with an animal skull. Strange place. I put my hands on the trunk of the tree. I wasn’t sure if I am not on private property, but it was definitely worth the risk. The tiny little path continued down the hill and more wows were waiting for me. Tall Eucalyptus trees forming a circle and an old chair in the middle of it was the next point on the way. Another stop was the first cave I saw on the island, made as a barn for animals, but not being used anymore. I heard there are many caves on the island, some built into cozy houses, some just partly built to be used as storage rooms or barns, some just natural. In some of them, you can sleep comfortably.
The path then led through the wide area full of these massive plants looking just like aloe vera in a massive form. Then there was a completely different plant area again, low wide deciduous trees which I could climb easily. Another little forest of those and just a little unsuspicious hole like an entry. Of course, I took it and a little tunnel between branches led me to a core of a big old tree and a swing being hung from its branch. Wooow. So sweet. So secret. So sacred. And all of this I discovered just by accident. These unplanned accidental amazing discoveries are what I love the most. Those that nobody recommended me, those I just found myself, being a true explorer. My heart was dancing with joy as I was swinging on this swing with my head tilted. And there was more waiting. The path led further through the high reed. A wondrous tunnel was arched through this reed, and I couldn’t feel more like Alice in Wonderland really. I got to the very bottom of this barranco (valley). In some parts of a year, a stream flows through it, you could tell that from the pattern of the ground there. I decided to walk by the bed of a dried stream further. Somewhere at the back of my head I still had a little uncomfortable feeling that I am on private land and that I maybe should not be there but my curiosity was much stronger, and I was constantly lured to move forward and see what’s hiding around the next corner. My eyes were sparkling, and all my senses were fully there.
The reed ended and a small piece of the jungle surrounded me. Old tall palm trees, with massive wide trunks and with lots of fallen branches all around the ground looked also like something I have never seen before. So pretty. So untamed and raw. I just couldn’t get enough of it all. I realized how extreme flip in my mood has happened since morning. The situation is not too good for me, but I managed to calm down, and enjoy the ride. I felt proud of myself. I felt like this is why I am here, this is the important thing. Exploring, admiring the beauty of this part of the world.
I got to the end of the stream bed, where were built high concrete walls. It looked like a raptor breeding station with all that jungle growing around and over the walls. I heard some distant voices all of a sudden. And two or three dogs barking. I got scared a little. My fantasy imagined an angry bunch of farmers, growing weed somewhere here, or dealing drugs, being angry that I entered their hidden land, letting dogs eat me alive. Of course, that’s a joke. But as I heard the voices getting closer I could feel my breath slowing down and my heart starting to beat more noticeably. I hid behind the palm and waited for what’s gonna happen. Blood full of adrenaline. After a while, the voices disappeared. I walked slowly back, treading carefully with the intention to make as little noise as possible. I also told off Daisy many times for running forward instead of staying close to me this time. After a while walking back through the barranco without any sign of anybody else’s presence I got back to normal and Enjoyed nature again. But because I do not like to go the same way back, I risked getting lost and continued by other paths further to the other side of the valley. I was on the way for a long time already and I knew it will probably get dark before I get home, but nothing could stop me from exploring more. I was in my flow.
My way changed into a real path again. I passed a little vineyard and a field with god knows what growing on it. I passed a little residence, which had a gate and a fence separating it from a road behind it. Now I knew for sure I am on private land. It was a large area spreading over this side of the valley with a few houses, each in a different part of it, but sharing the land around. I took various turns, some of them leading just to the field, others to the separated houses, so I had to go back many times. I was coming to another house when I noticed 3 dogs lying in front of it. I stopped and whispered Daisy’s name. She turned back and walked to me. I slowly walked backward. The dogs didn’t notice us for a while. Just when I thought I am out of it, one of them lifted his head and noticed us. They started barking and started to follow us very slowly. They looked wild and angry. If I didn’t shit my pants before, I definitely did now. But I kept walking back watching them. Without stumbling – quite don’t understand how I did it. And because the Universe and all my guardian angels love me, the dogs stopped at one point and stayed standing there watching us disappearing. Pheeeew. What do we say to the God of Death, Arya? Not today. I passed the enclosure with white horses. The sun was already getting down and they looked magical to me, like everything else on that walk, angry dogs including. I got back home with the dusk.
What an expedition!
I excitedly narrated everything to Lucas and Bara and showed pictures and videos. They loved it and they were super excited with me. Lucas wanted to know how to get there. When he saw the pictures of a tree he said it’s called dragon tree and that this one is a very old one, there is not much of those. Also they told me that the big plant looking like a massive aloe vera is agave. After dinner, when it got dark completely, I went to a near place, a fenced roof of some garages. I passed that place before and I knew I will come there at some point and enjoy the view from there. When I was coming, a big lizard showed himself in all his beauty for a moment and then disappeared. That was just the last cherry on the top of this day for me. I sat there, smoked a little, and watched the stars. Soothing music in my headphones. All good, all bad, all nice, all hard, one wave alternates the other, the good doesn’t exist without the bad and vice versa. If I only knew back then how amazing, wonderful and unforgettable time lies ahead of me on Gran Canaria.